'Wanna see some pictures of Sheryl? In bed. I'm looking at at her right now, through the window, writes Sam Wollaston. She doesn't know I'm watching her. It feels a bit wrong. But not that wrong, because Sheryl is a crow. Sheryl Crow, do you see?'
'Her husband's over there on the TV aerial, watching out for her. Russell, he's called. He's lovely - sometimes he comes over and vomits into her mouth - regurgitated worms, insects, carrion.'
Read 'Watch the birdie' on the Guardian News Blog.